Apparently, it happens to us all.

Alise and I were both in the bathroom the other night, doing what we do before bed. She was applying some kind of edible sounding stuff to her face, as she does on occasion, while I waited nearly patiently to use the facilities.

I'm really not a gentleman. I have often in the past 'gone potty' while she's been in the room. One interesting side effect of pregnancy though is a heightened, almost superhero like sense of smell. My deodorant has been forcibly changed, the cats can no longer secretly pee in a corner of a lesser used room and get away with it, and I must be alone when I wee. The sacrifices I'm making for this woman.

At one point she stopped what she was doing and looked at me. No doubt wondering what terrible thing she'd done in a past life to now find herself living with a man who was at that moment crossing his legs and humming the 'I gotta go' tune. As I looked back at her she gave me one of her 'you're cute and helpless' looks, and leaned towards me.

Anticipating a kiss, I closed my eyes and puckered.

As quick as a flash and while my eyes were closed, she grabbed a pair of tweezers and pecked at my nose like a small bird at a day old croissant. After 3 seconds of furious work, she stepped back to admire her work.

'Four hairs' she proudly announced. 'Four hairs from your nose'.

Let me just make one thing clear here. These hairs weren't living in my nostrils. These hairs were on the flat of my nose. Where hairs shouldn't ever grow.

Sadly, they are not alone. I've noticed hairs growing from my knuckles, my elbow, my neck and from the very crest of my ears.

In short, ladies and gentlemen; I'm getting old. When our child is 18, I will be 50 years old. FIFTY!! I'm not impressed.

Clearly, there isn't much that I can do about the age thing. I might be able to do something about the 'feeling old' thing though, and to that end I've set up a couple of games of tennis with some neighbors. My first match is on Wednesday, and as soon as I've recovered (probably Sunday), I'll let you know how I got on, and what injury I feigned to hasten the end of my punishment.