Oh what a tangled web...

Alise and I both use the internets about as much as we use oxygen. This is the case under normal circumstances as much as now, but our browsing habits have shifted a little. Personally I've been spending a little less time researching the moment of conception and a little more 'what happens when you wake up pregnant' – and while it is no less interesting it is certainly a lot more scary.

There is something to be said though for having all of these resources at our fingertips. I'm an old person, born in 1978 no less, so grew up largely without the internet. I have no idea how I survived.

While daydreaming earlier (if my boss asks I was solving a complex issue while meditating), I imagined a future conversation with our alien:

Me: you know, when I was your age there was no such thing as the internet.

Alien: What?? Then how did you find things out?

Me: if you wanted to know something you either asked someone who you trusted to tell you the truth, or you looked it up in a book.

Alien: And what if you wanted to know what was happening in a sports game or something?

Me: you listened to it on the radio, or read about it in the paper the next day.

Alien: Wow.

Me: Tell me about it.

Alien: You're really old.

Me: Yes, yes I am.

 

I'll be writing about some of our online findings, and how they compare to this pregnancy in due course. Allow me though, please, to place one thing firmly on the record.

 

A lot of these pregnancy sites have forums, where people can share their experiences. A lot of these people use abbreviations, as happens all over the nets (LOL, WTF, BTFO, you get the idea). There is one though that I had to ask Alise about, and which she found to be as strange as I.

 AF. AF is short for Aunt Flo. Aunt Flo is apparently a polite way of saying 'period'.

 I think that those people who are researching a pregnancy forum will be okay if they see the word 'period', please don't shelter me. If you need to use 'Aunt Flo' to shelter yourself, perhaps childbirth isn't the best idea for you?

 And now, a short poem/song, to the tune of John Denver's 'You fill up my senses (Annie's Song)'

 You look like a tadpole,

You're as small as a button,

You don't have an arsehole,

You don't even have ears,

You give your mom heartburn,

But you made her boobs bigger,

There's something about you,

That makes me feel good.

La la la la la la you make me feel good.